I'm sad. I'm just so sad. Because apparently I'm a disappointment, and the reason this family is falling apart, and I just cause every single problem. Which isn't true. But when she says things like that, and calls me stupid and not good enough, I do feel like I'm not good enough. I try to talk to her about that but whenever I say anything about how I feel like that, she thinks I'm calling her a bad parent, or that I'm too sensitive and need to get over it. So I'm really sad, and I don't know any other way to say how much I just want to go away, and I just really want someone to care.

And this day had been going pretty well. But now I'm worried about every part of it. Did I look crappy in my tennis pictures? Do the girls on varsity think I'm annoying? Will those chips I had make me gain weight? I was honestly doing so much better, and I was actually hopeful about everything. But I guess that's over now.